Scott here, putting in my 2 cents on the interweblog-thing. I might still be the only one with an American passport NOT on Facebook. I’m quite happy for that. I guess I miss updates on people, but I figure I don’t expect people to remember my birthday so they shouldn’t care if I miss theirs. Anyway, here things work differently. Picture a neighborhood where all the neighbors—with no artificial Facebook help—know and watch each other with keen interest. This is our, and everyone else’s, street.
About 6 weeks ago, some new people moved into the house next door. They’re actually newly arrived from the States, but originally they are of another people group blatantly disliked by our host culture. During the recent local holiday, we visited our other neighbors and the visit had 0 English. These times serve as benchmarks for our language and cultural progress, and we were pleased by how we stayed with conversation even between the family’s mother and children. What really shocked us was when they asked us for the dirt on the new neighbors from the other people group! We tried to defend the new neighbors as so not to contribute to the rumor mill. But it was the invitation to join in that made us realize we have crossed a fine, but important, line of trust in our setting. People ask us for our opinion and for our help now. It is so freeing to be at a point of understanding and being understood!
About 10 days later we visited another family that we have met with on and off for about 18 months. They usually compliment our language ability, but this visit we misread some cultural cues and the whole time was weird. About halfway through our time the mother started asking me why I hadn’t learned the language yet and that I should be doing so much better! Nothing like a true-faced comment to keep you humble!
It’s like a big game, being a foreigner attempting to acculturate. Every time we score a proverbial point, we realize that the locals are still way ahead of us! No matter how hard we try to understand the intricate web of details, causes and effects of society, we will always be on the fringe at best. The idea is to shed as much unnecessary cultural baggage as possible in order to assimilate and identify with people. Every day is seen with success and failure; you’re up, you’re down. Thank God for His grace to daily sustain us through this process and teach us to accept the position we are in.
